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Paul is a couples counselor and workshop presenter. He works with couples to harmonize differences in communication style and intimacy style. The Enneagram is a powerful tool he uses in his work. He teaches workshops to churches on the topic of Intimacy and Sacred Relationships. https://cocreativeworkshops.com/

A Cord of Three Strands is Not Easily Broken

A Cord of Three Strands is Not Easily Broken, Ecclesiastes 4:12

Traditionally, we know this means that a married couple who has God as part of their bond, has a strong marriage.  

Q:  How does a couple develop this bond with God? 

A:  The traditional answer is they pray together.  

A more complete answer, is that married couples are called to pray beyond words and feelings.  

Orgasms are for pleasure... AND spiritual growth.   

In sexual love, orgasm is a beautiful God-given gift, given not solely for pleasure, but especially for our spiritual growth.  The connection of orgasm is beyond mere words and feelings.  In orgasm, you lose every ounce of control.  Orgasm is a natural spiritual gift or sacrament  that unravels our natural human propensity to hide, be inauthentic, lie, cheat, or to be selfish.

In our spiritual journey, we are called to be transparent with God, allowing God to see all our imperfections, our brokenness, our sinful nature.  This humility helps us to rely on God.  Jesus dying on the cross is a lesson to us - to give up control.  To let go and let God.  This is the Christian Path. 

So, definitely pray together by sharing words and feelings.  This will make your marriage bond stronger.  But realize that the journey to having amazing orgasms is also part of the complete journey to strengthen your marriage.   Orgasms teach us to let go.  There are many ways to let go and let God.  Orgasms are the crème de la crème of spiritual gifts for married couples!  Orgasms can teach you to be more transparent, more honest, and more genuine with each other.  Orgasms are part of a healthy Christian marriage!

Therefore, A Cord of Three Strands is Not Easily Broken, when the cords are bonded by sexual passion.


Celibacy Means to Love All People

God is love, and you who abide in love abide in God, and God in you.  

1 John 4:16


Years ago when I was a priest in church ministry, I was a committed celibate.  I was taught that celibacy goes far beyond not marrying.  Rather, it is a call to love everyone.  In marriage, your love for your spouse and children is your top priority; after them, you are called to love all others.  Celibate love is a call to love all people, with equal priority.         



To love deeply is to share intimacy.  That is our Christian calling.   Celibates, those who are dating, resting singles, and married persons - we are all called to intimacy with our fellow humans.  We may (and will) fall short of this mandate, but this is our goal.




Our journey with the Lord is a call to deeper intimacy, whether you are married or celibate.  As such, we abide in God, and God in us.  And that is loving deeply.  

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